Sunday, June 6, 2010

Short Attention Span Theatre #2: A Case of the Punks!

Probably my all-time favorite song ever put to vinyl: Ashtray Heart by Beefheart and the Magic Band. Don Van Vliet dynamites the punks and new wavers for essentially ripping him off - in particular the 'Man on the Porcupine Fence', Johnny Rotten.

Fair or not, the man had a point.

And Beefheart's word play in this one is simply off the charts.

"Make Invalids out of Supermen..."

You used me like an ashtray heart

Case of the punks. 
Right from the start

I feel like a glass shrimp in a pink panty

With a saccharine chaperone

Make invalids out of supermen

Call in a "shrink"

And pick you up in a girdle

You used me like an ashtray heart

Right from the start

Case of the punks

Another day, another way...

Somebody's had too much to think

Open up another case of the punks

Each pillow is touted like a rock

The mother / father figure

Somebody's had too much to think

Send your mother home your navel

Case of the punks

New hearts to the dining rooms

Violet heart cake

Dissolve in new cards, boards, throats, underwear

Ashtray heart

You picked me out, brushed me off

Crushed me while I was burning out

Then you picked me out

Like an ashtray heart

Hid behind the curtain

Waited for me to go out

A man on a porcupine fence

Used me for an ashtray heart

Hit me where the lover hangs out

Stood behind the curtain

While they crushed me out

You used me for an ashtray heart

You looked in the window when I went out

You used me like an ashtray heart.

- Van Vliet

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Beast Cream For Doc

While I have long given up on the pastime of clamming through endless music blogs in search of pearls, I feel it worth the effort this time...

The good Captain Beefheart was soon to sail off into the none-set of mysterious illness. But not before digging through his back pages and delivering a three album return-to-form. Four, if you consider the original Bat Chain Puller recordings.

Great fan-made video

The 'Ice Cream For Crow' video that MTV felt was 'too weird' to air.

For as many brilliant artists as we've had throughout history, at least according to their doting fans, family and friends, it is a surprise we haven't risen to greater heights as a species. And no matter how many times I hear the 'genius' expression, it never gets old.

Hyperbole, after all, was laid off moons ago.

No. To me, there is no brilliance. There is no genius.

There is only Beefheart.

Bat Chain Puller - (Front), 1976
Never Officially Released
The Unheard Music blog

Shiny Beast (Bat Chain Puller) - (Front), 1978
Warner Bros. Records #BSK 3256
Forest Roxx blog

Doc At The Radar Station (Front), 1980
Virgin Records (Canada) #VM 2209

Visionearz blog

Ice Cream For Crow - (Front), 1982
Epic Records #ARE 38274
FRGK blog

Short Attention Span Theatre #1: The Hot Fudge Show

Early mornings have never been the same...

Syndicated out of Detroit from 1976-1982, it's the Hot Fudge Show!

While the memories are fading, I am pretty sure WKYC (Channel 3) in Cleveland used to broadcast this at 7:00AM every weekday morning.

"Hot Fudge. Right on!"

Links of Interest:

* Hot Fudge Show - Official Site

Thursday, May 13, 2010

40? Nope. No angst here.

First post in quite some time, but that is neither here nor there.

... Unless we're talking about Spot's CleSoul blog.

Updates at that place are like dentures to the gummy. Mad Dog to the rummy? I don't really know, but I enjoy that blog enough to stalk ... er, follow it for as long as Bob continues the education ride.

You see, I rode on the further most outskirts of Bob/Spot's social circles as a me-teen/young adult; a friends of friends type of deal.

The Normandy Freaks.
Domestic Crisis.
Doc's Shake Shoppe.

Essentially 'All of those kids cooler than I', or some such nonsensical truth.

I mooned over Kristi Huska for far longer than I dare admit, which - of course, tends to obscure all things. But that particular cast of characters did include many of the elite in the Parma punk scene: Jim Luppuci, Kristi, the Mysterious Mr. Konya... um... and a whole lot more, believe you me.

Oh, how I wanted to be like them. I'd hang around in my room pretending to be amputated, or a talented artist, or a frenzied mop of hair. Yet hiding behind the moron front I presented, the cool never did translate.

But I sure fell down a lot!

"Say it ain't so, Joe. Say it ain't so!"

One of the single most interesting of freaks in that entire scene was Spot.

The infamous Tony Erba was perhaps more gonzo to me; Jim Morgan and Mark Embrogno more directly influential; Corey Barnett more respected, but Spot... Spot was the King.

Just the mere mention of his name and the person opposite would frame a huge smile, chuckle to themselves, then let loose with the most amazing of stories you'd ever be likely to hear. Laughter and/or bafflement never ceased to follow.

Everyone - and I do mean everyone had a Spot Story they would pass amongst themselves. And not one of them mean-spirited. At least none that I ever heard or first-hand experienced.

I cringe, twitch and generally spaz out when thinking back on the things I've pulled over the years. Some of the funniest and more memorable, however, were inspired by the Spirit of Spot and his guerrilla theater of the absurd.

Twenty years down the road, Bob continues to serve as inspiration and entertainment.

And I'm still falling down.

Nope. No angst here!